February 7, 2011

The Waz Waz Show


Clubbing in Lebanon never fails to impress both tourists and Lebanese people living in the country or abroad. From the streets of Gemmayze, Hamra, Monot, Jounieh, and Byblos, to the happening clubs all over Beirut. I have always loved partying and there’s nothing more I enjoy than getting all dressed up and spending the night dancing, but one concept I will never learn to love or understand is the “One Man Show” culture and all that comes with it.

Yuck.
growling bear 300x196 La Wlooo...The Waz Waz Show 
I will be very immature about this in order to avenge my horrible Saturday night; as a result of spending three hours at a certain club . . . notorious for its “One Man Show” (and what a punishment that was). Let me start by saying that I merely existed for 3 hours as I stuffed my ears with rolled up tissue paper to avoid becoming deaf after the Godzilla’s lewd growling (a.k.a. the “One Man Show”) that so many people enjoy oh so much. Although all my brain cells had shut down as a self-defense mechanism, I mustered enough patience and energy to glance around me at what must have been a zoo or brothel. I could not believe what most people were wearing, I could not understand where/how they picked up their offensive dance moves, and I certainly could not understand how they were enjoying that repugnant music.

Yuck.
sexy catwomen costume 180x300 La Wlooo...The Waz Waz Show 
The clothes: Oh-My-God! Why? Why would a woman purposely want to look like a street prostitute? Even street prostitutes don’t like looking like street prostitutes. The men, oh the men, with their gold chains, hairy chests, and fake True Religion jeans – “1980’s pimp” style, gone bad.

The Fake: So many men and women were wearing fake clothes that my LV bag almost looked as though it was frowning. There are affordable labels everywhere, so if you can’t pay 400 USD for a pair of jeans, it’s fine; go and buy yourself a pair for 50 or 100 dollars. But no, these fakers prefer to spend that 50 USD on buying a fake pair of jeans because they care about the label more than their self-respect. Here’s a newsflash: fake jeans look fake from a mile away! Don’t think for a minute that people don’t notice – they’re probably just too polite to say anything. What about fake bags? Puh-lease! A garbage bag looks more expensive than the fake bags I see with certain girls. Point being, people that don’t wear designer labels aren’t going to know what you’re wearing – whether it’s real or fake, but people who are brand-conscious and actually own the real deal, are going to laugh at your desperate attempt to look stylish/fit in/be cool or whatever your pathetic excuse is.

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I am currently writing a weekly column called "La Wlooo!!" on BeirutNightLife.com that provides a light mockery of the silly things happening around us every day.
Don't take it seriously, after all, it is simply a breath of fresh air – stating the obvious with a bit of humor and a change of perspective.




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